So you know that book you’ve always wanted to write? The CD you really should record? Or maybe it’s a hobby that has the potential to become a career – or just an advancement you’ve had your eye on in your current vocation. We at The Pear Tree want to declare 2011 “The Year You Make It Happen.”
We all have dreams and “what if” scenarios. Too often, we don’t ever explore their potential or take the chance of turning a dream into a reality. That’s why our final resolution in this series is “follow that dream.”
“As children, ‘try’ meant, ‘make a wholehearted attempt to win’. Now, as adults, it means, ‘I gave it a little effort so I can shrug my shoulders and move on guilt free.’ Our goals today aren’t about winning, they are about follow through,” said Kelowna-based performance coach Rhonda Victoor. “It’s about doing the thing that we know will make our work or lives or relationships better. A wishy-washy-try attempt is really another form of procrastination. We’re still not committing to do anything specific and ongoing.”
Rhonda started Incite Coaching in 2000 and has since coached and presented all over Canada, the United States, South America and Europe. She’s co-authored the book Awakening the Workplace and released an audio book called Out With Schmoozing: Keys to Successful Networking.
As a performance coach (sometimes called life coach), she helps her clients get concrete about exactly what they want, then help them to see the path they need to take to get there.
“A coach … doesn’t accept excuses. She holds you accountable. And holds the mirror up so you can see, honestly, what perspectives or habits are keeping you stuck. Keeping you in try mode rather than do mode,” she said.
Part of what she does is push people past their excuses to embrace their potential. Common ones she hears include: “I’m too tired. Too old. Don’t have the money. Don’t have the time. Don’t believe I can do it. I don’t deserve it. I’m scared of being that fabulous person and maintaining that,” she said.
One of Rhonda’s favourite quotes is by Star Wars Jedi Master Yoda: “Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try.”
Whether your goal this year is moving up a few rungs on the old corporate ladder, starting a business of your own or just keeping the house cleaner, Rhonda says there are some key things to consider.
“Be honest about what you really want more of in your life. A lot of what you listed are ‘shoulds’. I should get a promotion or keep the house cleaner. But what I really want is more intimacy with my spouse and more laughter in my day. Ditch the ‘should’ and look honestly at what you’re really missing in your life. Then pick one tiny ritual that will get you there. Choose a time of day or week that fits your responsibilities. And commit to someone that you’ll stick to that.”
To help one of our readers on their way to fulfilling their dream, performance coach Rhonda Victoor is offering a free, 90-minute coaching super session over the phone (check it out her other services, including a group coaching session, by clicking on the link). Our randomly drawn winner will talk about what they want, and the steps they need to take to get it. To enter, leave a comment below telling us what you’d like to accomplish in 2011. A winner will be selected and announced Monday morning, 31 January. Good luck!
In the meantime, our two randomly selected winners for our Culturize Yourself giveaway are Julie and Joanne. Congratulations! You’ve both won a won year membership to the Kelowna Art Gallery! We will be in touch by email to work out details on getting your membership.
Update: January 31, 2011, Giveaway Winner!
The winner of this giveaway in the New Year’s Resolutions series is Kirsten Nilsen! Kirsten will receive a 90-minute consultation with performance coach Rhonda Victoor to help her get a start on her ambition for 2011! Congratulations! For everyone else, thanks for all your comments – keep reading for more fun giveaways down the road!